Mentoring is quite the buzzword these days. It seems everyone has a mentor and isn’t limited to an office setting. Since it is so pervasive today, we need to discern between good and bad mentoring.
This cartoon shows what happens when it turns into a bad excuse for a gopher role.
We consider leaders to be people with huge egos. And it does take self-confidence and bravado to rise up through the ranks of any organization or field. However, Ken Blanchard reminds me the biggest obstacle to a leader’s growth is their ego.
“The biggest obstacle that stalls leaders’ growth is the human ego. When leaders start to think they know it all, they stop growing.”
Ken Blanchard
We stop growing when we begin to think we know it all. After all, why stop growing if you’ve reached the pinnacle of knowledge and accomplishment? The ego is very good at stunting our growth.
And in an ever-changing world, it is foolish to believe we know it all in any and every situation. If the situation changes, how can past knowledge possibly account for that?
We experience this roadblock whenever we present a new idea and someone says, “We tried that before and it didn’t work.” Or, “The old way got us here. If it isn’t broke, don’t fix it.” Not only does ego keep us from growing, but it also stops us from moving forward.
Pride and haughtiness blind us. The moment we think we know it all is the moment we have chosen to close our eyes to possibilities. We stop thinking and start making excuses.
When a leader decides they know it all, they stall their growth. As a result, the organization they lead stalls. It may be subtle at first. It can take years to see the results. But slowly and surely, the organization begins to die.
A leader who lets ego define them soon finds their influence dying. Without growth, there is death. And without the humility to change, people and organizations tend to fade away.
The biggest obstacle to a leader’s growth is their ego. Let’s remember to have the humility and courage to acknowledge we don’t know everything.
It can be frustrating when things aren’t going your way. Someone isn’t meeting a deadline. That stupid supply chain is ruining your sales! Why can’t that kid do what I ask when I asked him? There are plenty of situations to get frustrated about.
Each time the frustration builds, we have an opportunity to make things better or worse. You can raise your voice and invoke fear to get things done, and it may work in the short-term. But what does that do in the long-term? Fear-based leadership is no leadership at all.
And what happens if it doesn’t make things happen, but the angry words just accelerate between you and the other party? Fear-based leadership become less effective when the other party is no longer afraid—even angrier than you. Then you end up with bigger problems.
There are plenty of reasons to get frustrated and lash out. But Proverbs 15:1 reminds me how we reply makes all the difference.
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
Proverbs 15:1 (KJV)
The last two years have been frustrating for everyone. There is no shortage of stories on people behaving badly because of frustrations. We don’t know what a person could be going through or what they’ve lost recently.
When tensions are high, we have an opportunity to make things better or worse by our reply. A soft answer could make all the difference in your day and mine!
“A life in which anything goes will ultimately be a life in which nothing goes well.”
Maxwell, John C. Developing the Leader Within You 2.0 (Developing the Leader Series)(p. 34). HarperCollins Leadership. Kindle Edition.
We all have at least some autonomy to do whatever we want. We can…
Yes, we have the freedom to do what we want. And in an anything-goes-world, there is much more beyond my imagination that any of us could do.
But sooner or later, we will suffer the consequences of bad decisions.
Anything goes is a poor strategy for going forward. We all need boundaries. We are accountable for our actions. John Maxwell had this quote concerning planning our daily-to-do list. It’s a reminder to me that even the decisions that may not appear to have large consequences can come back to affect us.
I recently wrote an article for Church of God news on a California pastor’s effectiveness at developing leaders. It is good when someone takes a leadership role. It is even better when a person mentors others to be leaders as well.
This has got me thinking about how I can be more effective as a leader.
This pastor is making an impact in his community. I got a lot of great lessons from his example.