Around this time of year, I remember my mom quoting from a poem. James Whitcomb Riley was a Hoosier poet. My classmates and siblings learned all about him in Indiana history class. Little Orphant Annie was one of his more famous poems.
You better mind yer parents, an’ yer teachers fond an’ dear,
An’ churish them ‘at loves you, an’ dry the orphant’s tear,
An’ he’p the pore an’ needy ones ‘at clusters all about,
Er the Gobble-uns’ll git you
Ef you
Don’t
Watch
Out!
“Little Orphant Annie” — James Whitcomb Riley
When you read it through modern eyes, it’s a very colloquial and little quaint. Yet it is also a little disturbing to think of the underlying threat if you’re naughty. You better mind your P’s and Q’s! Or the monsters are just waiting to grab you! Yikes!
Fear motivation never works out in the long term. But as a parent, I can think of times when it was tempting to say something similar. After all, isn’t the threat that Santa won’t bring toys if you are naughty a similar ultimatum?
Even so, I’ve come to realize fear motivation may work in the short term, but it is a lousy long term strategy. Someone disciplined with threats will either grow up to be fearful or defiant. Either the child will grow up to fear authority or shake his fist at it. It’s not an inspiring message, is it?
Fear and Loathing in the Southwest
About four years ago, I experienced the paralysis of fear motivation. My wife and I were called to Arizona for her ministry. We knew it was the right thing to do. I resigned from my job in Indiana and we made the trek to the Southwest. When we left our home, she had the job, but I was still looking for my next gig. I had a few leads, but nothing definite. I drove out with a mixture of fear and anxiety, tempered with hope.
I knew it was the right thing to do. Yet, I was also fearful. What if I didn’t find a job quickly? How would we survive? Sure enough, my prophecy of doom came true. I worked for a time as a deli clerk at a grocery store and did freelance illustration while I kept looking. It took eight months to find fulfilling work that would make use of my education and skills. Looking back, I wonder if it would have been a much shorter search if fear didn’t dominate my thinking.
I learned from that experience that fear motivation is not motivation. It is much more useful at paralyzing us than moving us to forward.
You can look toward the future with fear and dread. You probably won’t be motivated to do much. What’s the point if you’re convinced it will go badly? Or you can look toward the future with anticipation and enthusiasm. I learned from that experience four years ago that the latter is much better. It is more effective than watching for those mean, old goblins that will getcha if you don’t watch out!