Tag: relationships

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Career Community family

The Problem With Moving On

When we feel led to move onto a new adventure, it can feel exciting. The adrenaline flows as we negotiate all the tasks and plans. But there are complications. The problem with moving on is that there are always the great relationships we leave behind.

retro cab toy placed on concrete fence
Photo by Maddy Freddie on Pexels.com

My wife and I have moved on to a new adventue. Ministry is taking us to someplace new. While we will be joining some family at our destination, we will be leaving a majority of them a bit in Indiana and Ohio.

In addition, we got reaquainted with old friends when we came back, and made new ones. Our lives were richer for it.

So another problem with moving on is the trunkload of mixed emotions. We know we are heading in the right direction. Yet, we can’t help glancing one more time in the rearview mirror as we set out on a new trek.

There will be challenges and uncertainty in our new assignment. Then again, we fool ourselves into believing if we stay put, there is certainty. If 2020 taught us anything, it’s that there is much more that is out of our control than any of us would like to admit.


We are under no allusions that the next place will be perfect. We will face new challenges along with familiar ones. After all, we take our old selves to the new place.

There are problems with going and problems with staying. But if I could, I’d take all my friends and loved ones along with us.

Categories
Parenting Cartoons

Love Each Other or Perish

cartoon of parents and a son in a vehicle
Cartoon of parents and a son in a vehicle. The son says, "Love, love, love! That's all you ever talk about. Do you think the rest of the world operates this way?"

Today, there is so much conflict in the world. We see it with individuals, families, political groups, and nations. We seem to have forgotten a key value for survival: love each other, or perish!

For a class, I’ve been reading Tuesdays with Morrie. in the book, Mitch Albom quotes his dying professor:

“If you don’t have the support and love and caring and concern that you get from a family, you don’t have much at all. Love is so supremely important. As our great poet Auden said, ‘Love each other or perish.’”

Morrie Schwartz in Tuesdays with Morrie
Continue reading “Love Each Other or Perish”
Categories
family

Thoughts on a Marriage

"Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife." Franz Schubert

“Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife.”

Franz Schubert via BrainyQuote.com

On this day, thirty-three years ago, I was in an Ohio church, watching the most beautiful bride walk down the aisle. It was a warm, clear day for December and the church was decorated for Christmas. It was a fantastic start to our marriage.

Since then, we have gone through many challenges and experienced numerous blessings. Through it all, we have remained committed to each other. One of those challenges occurred in 2001 when I was laid off from a publishing company.

I was working a contract job as a graphic designer and we just celebrated our thirteenth anniversary. A coworker asked me what our secret was to a happy marriage. Without much thought, I blurted, “mutual submission.” I could tell that took her by surprise. She didn’t want to hear that. But twenty years later, I still hold it to be true.

Now some would say that isn’t a “biblical marriage.” They would tell me the scriptures say it is the wife should submit to the husband. After all, Ephesians 5:22–24 says that. And while I agree, I assert you can’t have Ephesians 5:22–24 without verses 25–33. That section instructs the husband is to do love with the greatest care. It requires both parties to a high level of love and respect.

Leadership in a marriage requires love, respect, care and consideration. It requires the kind of love Paul writes about in 1 Corinthians 13. That requires a submission that is counter-intuitive to any selfish, narcissistic perspective.

So yes, I still say today, a happy marriage requires each one to yield, acquiesce and be considerate of the other. All I can say is it has worked for me, and I am so glad it has!

Categories
children cartoons relationship cartoons technology cartoons

Do You Make the Best Use of Technology?

cartoon of girl and a boy with a web cam

The boy in this cartoon found a solution to his problem. He knows that if there is any chance he will have a social life in the future, he needs to show evidence he can talk to individuals of the opposite gender. When I drew this, the only thing that came to mind about “social distancing,” would have been the plight of poor, nerdy boys.

Technology can help us if we are smart about it.

  • It can help us keep connected as we continue to practice social distancing
  • It can help us get work done at home
  • It can keep kids going to school even as the schools are closed

But technology can also cause problems.

  • It can distract us from work or school
  • It can fill us with anxiety when we hear the same doomsday scenario over and over
  • It can keep us from disconnecting and make us feel like we have to be always on

How have you used technology wisely? What are some tips for those who may struggle with using it wisely?

cartoon of girl and a boy with a web cam
Categories
Attitude motivation

How Do You Stay Optimistic in a Pessimist’s World?

Cartoon of an angry girl and a drenched boy

Have you ever noticed that when someone is in a bad mood, they’re rarely interested in a dose of optimism?

My family was getting ready for a spring break trip. For whatever reason, my wife was having a bad day. It’s entirely possible I wasn’t doing my share of the preparation. It could be that the kids were tired and grumpy. For whatever reason, she seemed to be down and I decided it was my duty to cheer her up.

  • I tried silly jokes
  • I tried making humorous observations about the crazy drivers
  • I tried countering every negative comment with some wisecrack
  • I tried counting our blessings
  • I even tried making a silly face and getting right up to hers

The last one was a big mistake. Even though we were married, I voided her personal space. There’s only so much my poor wife could take. I went from being a purveyor of good, clean fun to just being obnoxious and annoying. She snapped. I realized my mistake and began to pout.

Minutes later, I noticed something. She was in a much better mood and I was the one in the dumps. My efforts worked, just not in the way I expected. She poured the glass of optimism all over me and she felt much better.

So how do you stay optimistic in a world that isn’t having any of it? I learned three lessons that day.

  • It is unwise to base your feelings on the emotions of someone else, even those closest to you
  • Being annoyingly optimistic and obnoxious about it can only irritate others
  • When someone closest to you is down, it’s sometimes best to give them the space to feel their emotions

We ended up having a great trip. I learned a valuable lesson about relationships. And yes, we both have learned a lot about optimism over the years.

Cartoon of an angry girl and a drenched boy