Some people thrive on conflict while others cower at the thought of it. We all face it one way or another throughout our day. The media and social media thrives on it. It feels like conflict resolution is out of vogue these days.
How do we diffuse conflict? Should we just accept it as a fact of life now? Is it the cost of living in a polarized world? A quote by Wayne Dyer reminds me of our part in conflict resolution.
“Conflict cannot survive without your participation.”
Wayne Dyer via BrainyQuote.com
We don’t have to participate in disagreements if we don’t want to. While it’s true our egos can get the best of us, we have a choice each day whether to participate in all the animosity and consternation. It really is up to us.
The other day, I was working with someone who was in quite a sour mood. When I spoke about an issue, I got a grumpy response. Now, I don’t always rise to the occasion. But in this instance, I resolved not to participate. I kept my voice low and the matter didn’t escalate. The conflict didn’t survive. While it doesn’t make for a great story, it did make for a better day.
Stories thrive on conflict. The hero faces a problem, rises to the occasion, and conquers it. Conflict makes a great movie or a book thrilling. But in our everyday lives, we don’t have to make every situation one filled with conflict. While there are principles that we should protect, not every situation is a conflict we have to conquer.
Therefore, we need to choose our battles. We can consider if the conflict we are facing is worth our participation in or not. Sometimes, conflict resolution is as simple as refusing to participate in it.
