Christmas on the Freeway

Cartoon of two boys under a Christmas tree. One says, "It must have been tough for Joseph and Mary. Can you imagine driving a donkey on the freeway?"A freeway is a place of busyness. We are speeding by, barely noticing what is going on around us. A freeway is made to get us somewhere as quick as possible.

Experience has taught me a freeway is not a place for contemplation or for quiet reflection. It is not a place you would expect Joseph and Mary. Every once in a while, we need to get off the freeway, pause, and reflect on what we are thankful for this holiday season.

Away in a manger, and what’s all that noise?

Cartoon of a nativity scene with a cow and donkey. The cow says, “Nonesense, my dear Donkey! It wasn’t my lowing, but your braying that woke the poor baby!

Away in a Manger is one of my favorite Christmas carols, but it takes so many liberties with the Christmas story. Do stars really look? was there hay in the manger? and there are no details about the livestock in attendance. 

I think the cow has a point. If you ever heard a donkey bray, you know it would be hard to sleep through that. Then again, the lyrics flow as it is. Who wants to sing about a braying donkey? I’ll leave it as is.

The Incredible Floating Christmas Tree

Cartoon of two fish staring at a tree. One say, "Every Christmas, it's the same thing. When will they make a Christmas tree that won't float?"

Christmas trees can be one of those traditions that can cause disasters. Is it too big, too short, too full, or too sparse? Did your family always do a real tree or is artificial the way to go because of all the sap and clean up?

And don’t even get aquatic creatures started on the hassles of getting a tree. You just can’t keep one in an aquarium without weighing it down with a ton of lead garland!

Saint Nick and Noncompetes

Cartoon of a stern businessman and Santa Claus. The man says, “I saw you at another mall, Santa. What about our noncompete agreement?”

Santa has a tough time in the retail world. He gives toys away, he cares about good behavior, he works at all the malls without concern for competition,  and his distribution system is superb to Amazon’s. Keep it up, Santa. We love you just the way you are!

Watch your sleigh, Santa!

Cartoon of Santa chasing his runaway sleigh

Cartoon of Santa chasing his sleigh. The caption reads, “Thanks to a joy ride, Christmas was nearly canceled!”

I don’t know why Santa would trust those elves. They always looked a little too mischievous for my taste.

Google is helping Santa Claus this year. Apparently, you can track where he’s at using Santa’s Dashboard.

I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas. And if you hear a clatter on your rooftop, it may be those crazy elves taking a joy ride!

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