Category: motivation

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motivation

Did I Make That Call Today?

©2013 Speartoons, Inc

Texting has revolutionized the way I communicate. If I suddenly have something I want to share with my wife or kids, I can send it immediately and not worry if they are busy. I can send a note of encouragement to a friend. I don’t have to dispense with the pleasantries of small talk before getting to the point. I can make the point and have an answer in a moment.

But the temptation is to make that the primary form of communication because it is so effortless. It’s easy to type a thought and send it. A lot can be lost in translation. It is difficult to make a true connection with a few words and no context. A text is an electronic sticky-note. Make sure when you are using it, it’s the appropriate way to communicate in that situation.

Sometimes it is just better to make the call. But it can feel awkward if I’m out of practice. It can feel too easy to hide behind a text. I’ve heard of couples breaking it up over a text. Really? It may be easier but it is not the way to deal with something so emotional.

Sometimes it is better to make the call or to visit someone in a person. If I have something important to say, I will make that call today.

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motivation

I Had One Job!

Cartoon of a boy and a teacher. The boy says, "That was due today? Seriously? I need help.Where can I get some homework insurance?"

Looking back, it seemed such an easy job. All I had to do was complete my homework and turn it in. I had no other obligations. I didn’t have a job, nor did I have a side hustle. After all, I was in third grade.

I had plenty of motivation. I am a firstborn son and very self-conscious. I yearn to do the right thing and do it well. I feared my third-grade teacher because she was a yeller. I didn’t want to get on her bad side. Yet, somehow I forgot to do my homework that day. I had one job and I didn’t do it. I remember the yelling. I had to stay in the class at recess time. What was I thinking?

Cartoon of a boy and a teacher. The boy says, "That was due today? Seriously? I need help.Where can I get some homework insurance?"

Now I know why I didn’t do my homework. I reasoned there was nothing I could do to please my teacher. In fact, I was sure she expected me to mess up. So I delivered and didn’t disappoint her.

Frequently, I’ve heard the phrase, you had one job… as a joke. A seemingly simple job can be messed up. It may appear to others that a person had only one task to do, while it may have been one in a dozen that day. What seems obvious in hindsight may not have been so when the work was done. If a supervisor expects a direct-report to mess up, they frequently don’t disappoint.

I had one job in third-grade and I didn’t do it that day. I learned my lesson and got my homework completed after that. However, it took years for me to see myself as a good student and to do the work because I wanted to, not because I feared some wrath. I was motivated by fear, not by the enjoyment of learning something new.

Expect the best in people today. Sure, they may disappoint and there may be times when we wonder what they were thinking. But it is better to expect the best and get disappointed once in a while than expect the worst and get it every time.

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motivation

Children and Investing for the Long Haul

Cartoon of an older man and a boy

This may be a little sappy this morning. After a fantastic weekend with my kids, they leave to go back to their homes on the other side of the country today. My wife and I will shed a few tears. We’ll laugh at a few memories and awkward moments we had this weekend. We’ll cherish the remaining time and long for when we will be together again this summer. 

It is good to be at this side of parenting and to see two children grow up to be vibrant, pleasant, fun adults. It makes those sleepless nights, diaper changes, endless questions, messy living rooms and the pain of enduring adolescent angst worth it.

My prayer for myself today is that I continue to remember what it was like to be a child and remember what it was like to parent young kids. There are invaluable lessons for all phases of life.

Cartoon of an older man and a boy

My prayer for you today is if you are going through a difficult time in your marriage, parenting or business, I encourage you to stick it out.

  • The grass is rarely greener on the other side of the fence.
  • What seems like a permanent problem will be here and gone in an instant.
  • Don’t confuse a problem with a person.
  • We all change. If we’re intentional and persevere, we’ll change for the better.
  • In business and in families, the long-term approach gives a much better return-on-investment than the short-term perspective.
  • Don’t let the urgent trample the important.
  • If you have to choose between business and family, choose family. They will be there to the end.

Keeping a long-term perspective promotes health and growth. It makes marriage and family totally worth it in the long haul.

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motivation

Weddings Beget Marriages

Photo of decorated rafters at a wedding venue

I had the honor to witness the wedding of two very special people yesterday. It was wonderful to see two people make a commitment to one another and begin their lives together. Weddings mark the beginning of an institution with so much potential filled with hopes, dreams and love.

Can filled with lit glow sticks

Weddings are wonderful and important. But they are just the start of a marriage. Too often, we get excited about the big event, then lose enthusiasm quickly in the long haul.

My wife and I were at our reception table. She asked the couples how many years they were married. One said thirty-three years. Another thirty-seven. A third had been married twenty years. We have been married for thirty-one years. Between the four of us, there were one hundred and twenty-one accumulated years. In today’s world, that is so uncommon and special.

Each of the couples has had wonderful moments and challenges. Some of us had been there for the other couple in a difficult time. We have laughed and cried together. We had done life together.

I cherish the wedding day my wife and I had on a sunny December day. But I cherish even more the journey we have had in our marriage. The beginning event and the vows are great. The result of living out those vows through the years is even better.

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motivation

More Hope for Fools Than the Conceited

Cartoon: Pride and Humility

In 1980, Mac Davis had a hit with the song, It’s Hard to be Humble. Whenever I heard it, I thought it was hilarious because it seemed the singer had no clue how off putting it is to be so conceited. One verse particularly stood out to me:

Well, I could have lotsa friends if I wanted,
But then I wouldn’t stand out from the crowd.

Hard to be Humble lyrics at MetroLyrics.com

When I heard that, I would think that this poor guy didn’t have a clue. Conceit has a way of blinding the conceited person and making them a pariah. A conceited fool is someone to be pitied.

Seest thou a man wise in his own conceit? there is more hope of a fool than of him.

Proverbs 26:12 (KJV)
Cartoon: Pride and Humility

Whenever a person, company or organization has success, they can fall into the conceit trap. Employees working for conceited companies can become conceited themselves. Have you ever tried to call customer service at a company that is a monopoly? Lily Tomlin had a skit where she was Ernestine, the Telephone Operator. It’s a take on two monopolies that had lost touch with customer service. I thought of that skit when “The Phone Company” was going through a court-ordered break up in the 1980s. I thought of it when Kodak imploded because thought they invented the digital camera, they were too conceited to sell it until it was too late. I thought of it when General Motors went through bankruptcy.

Conceit blinds us all. It turns successful people and companies into irrelevant dinosaurs. It blocks us from finding solutions to challenges. It makes us even more risk-averse because who wants to try something new and risk failure when they’ve been so successful in the past? It turns formerly productive people into lazy slugs.

Oh Lord, it’s hard to be humble! But find a way to do it anyway. We must place ourselves in situations that require humility if we want to spare ourselves from becoming a conceited, irrelevant bore.